Fifteenth FPR – Pep’s Drafthaus Original The 5 Meat Treat

This one is a request by Ben McFarlando. He wrote:

“Please add to your reviews a brand new pizza named Pep’s Drafthaus “5 Meat Mas”h… [sic] its literally the best frozen pizza I’ve ever had, Bought it at Sendiks & Woodmans.”

As you can see below, Ben McFarlando is a big name in the FP community. I was very excited to get a comment from him, so I just had to review this Pep’s Drafthaus 5 Meat Mash.

Yes Ben “big ben frozen pizza wisconsin” McFarlando

Pep’s Pizza is named after Pep Simek – A frozen pizza innovator, good old Wisconsin boy,  and founder of Tombstone Pizza. After Pep sold Tombstone to Kraft in 1986, he wanted to make his pizza passion a little more personal, so he started a new company and named it after himself. His estate also owns Captain Morgan’s Retreat in Belize. What a guy.

Pep’s Pizza initially only offered their “Original Thin Crust Pizza”, but recently (probably June based on their new Facebook cover photo date) they added the Drafthaus pies to their lineup. This move isn’t innovative, a lot of FPM’s have been pivoting towards a more artisanal approach, but I appreciate the work Joseph “Pep Jr.” Simek is doing in memory of big pep pep.

This is definitely the most massive frozen pizza I have ever reviewed, maybe it is the biggest frozen pizza ever. I am just not sure.

• suggested cook time 17-22 minutes
• $7.99
• 33.6 ounces (stupid thicc)
• 2460 Cal/FP
• Above average: 308 Cal/$, 4.2 oz/$

I purchased this FP at the new Festival Foods. They have a pretty decent selection of FP’s, some I have never seen before.

FP review:

Appearance:

This FPP is interesting, this is one of the most lavish looking pies, but it’s packaged in a very plain shrink-wrapped casing. I think I like it. Here’s how it looks:

Over two pounds. What do they mean “mash”?

With the wrapper off, you can see the mozzarella in two formats; shredded and parsley topped chunkz. There’s also five meats: Sweet Italian Sausage, Spicy Sausage, Pepperoni, Ham, and Bacon. I know you are all wondering “what is the difference is between the Sweet Italian Sausage (SIS) and the Spicy Sausage (SS)?”. The difference is the SIS has disodium inosinate, and the SS has paprika.

Five meats, all pork. Maybe the mozz is pig cheese.

 

I cooked it for about 17-22 minutes, and it came out looking like this:

So much cheese. At this point I would believe you if you told me it was a “one meat mash”

Great cheese, I really like how the spices set on top of the pie. This looks great.

Nose:

It smells a lot like Portesi Cheese Fries with tomato sauce. A little bit of garlic, a little bit of parsley, and a little bit of sodium erythorbate. Pleasant.

Mouth-feel:

Very good here. Plenty of sauce, crispy crust, gooey cheese, and toppings that don’t goop around. Even the bites with huge chunks of sausage are great, which usually isn’t the case for meat dominated pizza bites (sometimes they get a little too greasy). The cheese is really a standout here too. It is spread very thick, but it breaks apart easily when you bite through it, and it stays fixed to the crust so it doesn’t completely slide off after your first bite.

Overall:

I think Carrol Armstrong said it best when she said “…it was the best frozen pizza I’ve ever tasted (ate) and I’ve tried a variety of frozen pizza’s and like I said Pep’s is the best. …It was very flavorful and yet not real strong just right.” Well maybe not the best, but this was an exceptional pie.

Ratings:

Value: 84/100 – At $8/pie it might seem like a raw deal, but when you look at the metrics this pie holds its own.

Taste: 94/100 – One of the best, well spiced, v nice.

Aura: 85/100 – I kind of like that they have this great pizza in such plain packaging. Teddy Roosevelt would’ve loved it.

Mouth-feel: 91/100 – Juicy bites, plenty of sauce, never too crusty, never too cheesy.

Overall: 88.5/100 – B+, Would’ve rounded up to an A if they showed up to discussion.

Suggested wine paring – Underwood Rosé

Wow, thanks for the suggestion Ben. I hope everyone has a good time.